
Flux Magazine
"K1" / "When I looked in your eyes" / "If Love ever pays a visit" by Caprial Koe
K1
I can’t save the girl who chases the wind
Blown white dust on the road just to feel alive
Who chases smoke in the distance to blur her anxieties
I can’t save the girl who lays in the street
Because she likes the rush of the cars as they go over her
But that rush she yearns for gets her run
over again and again and again
I can’t keep being the white dashes on the street
Trying to keep her in line
Trying to keep her safe
My paint is fading
My heart is cracked
Striking against the contrast of the blacktop
as a final plea to tell her to stand up and chase the stars instead of the smoke
and the dashes instead of the dust
Because somewhere down this old cracking road is the destination she’s been waiting for all her life.
When I looked in your eyes...
Expecting you to be there
Expecting you to care
Is exhausting
As I get lost in the echo
Of your hollow words
Whispers of emotions
You didn’t feel
Telling others of first sight
and first touch
but truly not recalling them
I became the victim
Of your “three word lie”
As I feel my heart die
knowing you can never
knowing you will never
Feel the way I felt
when I looked into your eyes
If Love ever pays a visit
I will guard my heart with every door knock with every text
with every call
Through it all, I won't believe
That this socalled "Love" won't leave
I got trust issues I perceive
Because Love took everyone around me
Without ever grazing my skin
Watching as I wallowed, Love sat with a malicious grin Knowing the insecurities would consume me
Using selfinflicted insults to reduce me
To who I am today
A selfdeprecating loner
who would let Fear and Sadness in the door But Love no more
Because if Love ever pays a visit
I won't believe it anymore.